L’apéritif du soir

Do you enjoy your own company? I don’t mind mine. They say one of the early indications of madness is talking to oneself but I cant see the harm in it.. after all no-one gets upset and you can play Devil’s advocate, role-play scenes and swear away to your heart’s content..

Although people who live alone undoubtedly surf the web and chat on blogs and the like, I find that its preferable to have real life coversations with people who are who they say they are.

And whilst you can’t trust every Tom, Dick & Harry you met down the boozer, its evident that there is the temptation on the net to invent a personality cos it’s a secret and you can have a bit of fun pretending to be someone you aren’t.

I don’t do that.. but I wonder how many do.. until they give it up as the more webs of deception you spin, the more entangled you become..

While at home immersed in Cyberspace I dedicate a tiny portion of my time to this blog.. it’s partially an experiment, partially an outlet, partially a bit of fun flavoured with a pinch of reaction seeking..  and just maybe I’m evolving as a blogger…I’ve moved on from attempting to write neat and cohesive articles as I’ve found that you can put self-imposed pressure on yourself writing a blog,  especially after some receiving some nice feedback. You wonder how you’re going to live up to expectations.. in reality there aren’t any..it’s self obsession manifested in pseudo-journalism..

So from now on I’ll just spout off as it enters my head… even after a couple of cold-ones.. if you know what I mean? Yeah, that’s where I nicked the title from… a bottle of Leffe (Belgian beer to the tee-totaller).

I used to try and write stuff in an ordered fashion.. going back years..buy a nice clean notebook, a quality pen, underline the title, consider sub-headings and such; alas finally the inspiration had melted away and I was left with an empty shell of good intentions.

Now, it’s become a rush of blood, get it down, have it out on the page where there is no proverbial ink to dry, only the irritation of needing to spell-check the garbled etymology.

Going back to the begining, I don’t think I’m really losing my marbles.. there are shoppers in supermarkets here who I’ve spotted mumbling away to themselves, seemingly pondering their potential purchases. Are they crazier than yours truly? perhaps not, but they’re talking to themselves in public nonetheless.

Hand on heart, I believe that a touch of imagination in the head is probably a healthy thing, track back to childhood and you may have invented a fantasy world, country or football team for yourself. It can be something to fall back on… a support in an hour of need.. somethng to call upon when there’s nobody at hand to talk to.

Yes, real people that you love & trust are better muses, punchbags and mirrors.. you can use and abuse them, that’s why they love you.. and of course it’s mutual… but when all else fails… or at that time in your life when it’s you between the four walls then don’t let your thoughts fall upon deaf ears.. be there for yourself.


1 Comment

Filed under Philosophy

One response to “L’apéritif du soir

  1. Oh yeah! I chat with meself all the time. Once when I was working in a certain chain bookstore that shall remain nameless, in spite of its infamy as a store unlike any other across the chain’s states, where was I? Oh yeah, I was on mag detail on a busy Sunday night, chatting merrily along as I matched Cosmo with Cosmo ta ta ta ta …and this rather nice young whipper snapper silently started following me until I caughht him. We faced off for a moment of curiosity and then he announced, “You know, it’s a proven fact that people who talk with themselves in public places are rather damn smart.”
    “Oh yeah,” said I. “Then what the hell am I doin’ in this joint?”
    Laughter much.

    But seriously, ya gotta be comfortable inside your own head or all is freakin’ a lost cause in my book. And that entails chatting with your ‘mind’ too.

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