WARNING – Some might find this post offensive (although to be honest I couldn’t give a fiddler’s fart.. just don’t read any further then)
Go on, get it off your chest.. have a good cuss.. have a nice long rant; not only is the odd naughty word a useful way to diffuse anger & stress but it’s also an integral part of our lovely English language.
But flick through your typical ‘Business’ text-book looking for the ‘bad’ words and you’ll come up empty-handed.. dey don’t put ’em in.
Should they though?
Well, I have to admit that it wouldn’t be terribly tasteful dear and as one of my colleagues once memorably put it, it could be construed as ‘unpolitically correct’…
But we speak like dat..!
Well, aherrmm, cough, cough, splutter, splutter, most terribly sorry Vicar.. my mouthful of tea went down the wrong way.. we jolly well do not! whoever heard such a wanton fib..?
Pull the other one!
Alright, one might utter the odd expletive under cover of ones breath, although if one may hasten to add, one tries to avoid such filthy words if at all possible.
One doesn’t does one?
OK OK, I don’t.. but if you would just let me finish.. my opinion is that by employing rude and abusive language, we are lowering the tone and leaving ourselves open to disdain, ridicule and consternation.
Wot? Bleedin’ ‘ell fella yaw got owt a bed wrong bloody side dis mornin’ dint ya? Leave owt the big words will ya.. you swallow a dictionary or sumfink?
Goodness gracious my dear chap.. calm down and take a ‘chill-pill’, that’s what they say these days I do believe, if I am not very much mistaken? I do feel as if I’m swimming against the tide trying to follow the gist of your arguments..
eh? yous talkin’ bollocks mate..
…. and I could go on I such a fashion, it’s plain to see that our two friends are ‘talking at cross purposes’/’they don’t dig each other’ (delete as appropriate)
The point is – if you go down on the factory floor, gather the staff around and dribble on at them in purely ‘management speak’ you ain’t gonna connect. They’ll think you’re talking posh and trying to fob them of with top brass bullshit.
Yeah man I feel ya.. Folks just got to communicate with folks on their level, period. Tellin’ the guys that ‘We’ve discussed means of optimising productivity and the general consensus is that we need to rationalize’ will go down like a ton of bricks… ‘There are going to be lay-offs’ is more to the point innit?
If you’re going to give people bad news, at least tell it straight.
So what’s to be done Einstein?
Easy. Include Unit 13 – ‘Swearing’ in the holy bibles of bizniz teaching. At the end of the day, if we can’t find fuck in the textbook (pun & double-entendre fully intended) we feel unwilling to use it in the lesson. I mean seriously, people do tend to use a quite bit of blue language and it has its place. Used correctly amongst consenting adults, it can have the dersied effect too. And even if some might not wish to use it themselves, the chances are they are going to hear it spoken, so awareness helps.
Another advantage of putting this unit at the end is that we rarely ever finish the bloody book, so no-one will notice unless you choose to ‘go there’.
In conclusion: swearing will be found at all levels of a business and by not teaching at least the ‘essentials’, we are frankly, pulling the wool over our trainees eyes.
… plus it’s more entertaining in class than shite like the past perfect continuous.